You Are Not the Centre of the World

Read And Lead - Masterclass 2026

The meeting discussed the book "The Courage to Be Disliked" by Fumitake Koga and Ichiro Kishimi. We elaborated on the concept of community feeling, emphasising horizontal relationships over vertical ones. The discussion highlighted the pitfalls of praise and rebuke and advocated encouragement and gratitude instead. The session also addressed the importance of contributing to the community in building self-worth and courage. Participants shared their thoughts on applying these principles in various contexts, including education and work.

Key Takeaways

  - Reject Vertical Relationships: Avoid praise and rebuke, as they create a manipulative hierarchy. Instead, establish horizontal relationships grounded in mutual respect.

  - Practice Encouragement: Replace judgment with gratitude ("Thank you") to acknowledge effort and foster courage. This affirms a person's value without creating dependency.

  - Find Belonging Through Contribution: A true sense of worth comes from feeling beneficial to the community, not from external validation.

  - Use the "Larger Community" Principle: When facing hardship, remember the world is bigger than your immediate problem. This perspective provides a refuge and prevents minor issues from becoming overwhelming.

The "Rolling Stone" Analogy

  - The session began with a reflection on the "rolling stone" analogy from the previous week's reading.

  - Meaning: A person who seeks constant validation loses their "sharp corners" (individuality) and becomes powerless, carried away by societal currents.

  - Contrast: True freedom involves standing firm and speaking up, not conforming to the herd.

"You Are Not the Centre of the World"

  - The book's core premise: while you are the protagonist of your own life, you are a member of a community, not its centre.

  - Self-Centred View: Treating others as existing to serve you (the "prince/princess" complex) leads to disillusionment and resentment when expectations are not met.

  - "Globe vs. Map" Analogy:

      - Map: A flat, subjective view with one's own location at the centre.

      - Globe: A spherical, objective view where every point is a potential centre, illustrating that no single person is the absolute centre.

  - Active Contribution: A sense of belonging is earned through active contribution, not passive presence. It requires asking, "What can I give to this person?"

The "Larger Community" Principle

  - Adler's concept of community is infinite, extending beyond immediate circles to include the entire universe.

  - Purpose: To provide a refuge when struggling in a smaller community (e.g., school, workplace).

  - Application: When facing adversity, listen to the "voice of the larger community."

      - Example: If a teacher is authoritarian, remember that in the larger community of human society, you are equals. This perspective empowers you to object to unreasonable demands.

Vertical vs. Horizontal Relationships

  - The book advocates for rejecting vertical relationships (hierarchy) in favour of horizontal relationships (equality).

  - Vertical Relationships:

      - Praise & Rebuke: Both are manipulative tools that create a hierarchy.

          - Praise: A judgment from a "superior" to an "inferior."

          - Rebuke: The "stick" to praise's "carrot."

      - Intervention: Forcing your will on another's task, driven by a belief in your own superiority.

  - Horizontal Relationships:

      - Encouragement: The alternative to praise/rebuke. It is assistance that respects task separation.

      - Gratitude: Expressing thanks ("Thank you") acknowledges effort without judgment.

          - Why it works: It allows a person to subjectively feel they are beneficial, which builds courage.

          - Contrast with Praise: Praise forces adaptation to another's values, limiting freedom.

Discussion & Application

  - Teacher-Student Dynamics: The group discussed how praise creates an unconscious vertical hierarchy in the classroom.

  - My Good School Model: The organisation was cited as an example of a horizontal structure.

      - Key Elements: Openness, accessibility, and a focus on challenging opportunities over direct praise.

      - Rationale: Providing challenging work demonstrates confidence in a person's ability, fostering internal fulfilment.

Next Steps

  - Gurdeep:

      - Share the Otter AI summary and bookmarked page in the WhatsApp group.

Building Confidence in Speaking - Shalu Sharma

Building Confidence in Speaking - posted by by Manisha Khanna

Children learn best when they are given the freedom to choose and express themselves. It was observed that during the activity, participation was very high. The children enjoyed receiving stars and tokens, which motivated them to share their answers eagerly. They spoke more, tried using different words, and seemed happier and more confident

Shalu Sharma 

Sunbeam School Bhagwanpur

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The Academy

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Pic Courtesy Nehar Parmar for The Fabindia School

Future of School Education - Long-lasting success in professional learning needs a ‘culture of learning,’ and this is where I feel that if teachers do not take charge of their knowledge, there is no future. The teachers need to discover themselves; they need to learn more methods; they need to share more and overcome the lack of professional learning. It is high time for the PLCs (Professional Learning Communities) to take charge. You too can support your teams to design the Future of Learning – which could be a focus on the level of the classroom and transformation in organisational culture.

Ravi Kaimal: Building The Fabindia School

Ravi Kaimal has been involved with the school since the first brainstorming discussions with John and William Bissell. Ravi is a professional architect and is responsible for the design of the school buildings. He was also Chairman of Bhadrajun Artisans Trust (BAT), the non-profit, tax-exempt charitable society founded by William Bissell which established the school in 1992 and continues to help guide the school and provide financial support. Ravi writes, “The first block was designed to be built using maximum local materials and local skills so that it could be done with the least cost and time. The buildings are made almost entirely of stone available in the local area, and there is no wood used as wood is expensive and vulnerable there. This also came close to Mahatma Gandhi's approach of using only materials which were locally available. So our buildings are very much of their place, geography, climate and people. They are also optimized for their function, with very little energy being used.

On the start of the hot summer of 1992 at the start of digging for the foundations of the first block at the school in Bali, the earth was so hard that water- bought from a farmer- had to be poured on it to break it! As you can see today, the land was barren and there was no soft greenery, only thorny bushes.”

Ravi Kaimal, visiting the area frequently prior to the school being set up to collaborate and brainstorm with John and William Bissell; As the Principal and Founder of Kaimal, Chatterjee Associates, an architectural firm in New Delhi, Ravi is responsible for designing the innovative Fabindia School campus, including the use of green space and open buildings. Ravi's formal training includes a B. Arch (1987) from the School of Planning; Architecture, New Delhi and has been practising in Delhi since 1990. Ravi's interests and experience extend beyond architecture to photography, art direction for films (Art Director of Arundhati Roy's feature film) and rural education; Ravi has travelled extensively in India, Nepal, Sri Lanka, US, Spain, Italy and UK photographing places of architectural and environmental significance. He is the recipient of a prestigious UNESCO award for heritage conservation for his work in Rajasthan.

Update and directions for Award Volunteers

THE WORKSHOPS AND PROGRAMMES BEING RUN IN THE NEXT FEW MONTHS ARE A PART OF THE 'CAPACITY BUILDING AND TRAINING' (CBT) INITIATIVE, SPECIALLY FUNDED BY THE INTERNATIONAL SECRETARIAT, THESE WILL NOT BE REFERRED TO AS National Training Workshop (NTW), AS IN INDIA THE NTW (NATIONAL TRAINING WORKSHOP) IS AN ANNUAL FEATURE AND IS BEING HOSTED BY THE ZONES in ROTATION.

The next NTW is being managed by the South Zone, and Mrs. Margarette Davidraj is planning this in January 2010 at Ooty.

With kind support for the new Development Plan from the Trustees and funds from IS, the renewed focus will be to build the 18-25 year Award Programme, the emphasis will be on Capacity build and Training (CBT) at a national level.

CBT and NOT 'NTW', will carry forward the theme of youth engagement and work on ways to deliver the Programme for the 18-25 age groups

Building on the core competency and capacity building in India, the focus will be on:

• Train the Teachers and Award Volunteers
• Offer a snapshot of the Award experience
• Responding to an enhanced national agenda

The effort is promote the Award Programme in partnership with the Corporate and Social sectors. This will be in addition to the good work being done by the Zones at the School level, for 14-18 age groups. The National Award Office, will focus on building the Award Programme in partnership with corporate / social / institutions and groups that further the education and development agenda.

The forthcoming events are :-

September : Role of Volunteers 

October 9-11 : CBT "Capacity Building and Training Workshop"
last date of filing nominations is 21st August 2009-08-14
Please email to sandeep.dutt@iayp.in if you need the form.

December - Award Holders Forum

All the three events are being funded by a special one-time grant by the International Secretariat and will be delivered in New Delhi alone.

When the Zones choose delegates / participants, there is the need to choose individuals in light of the new enhanced national agenda please.

Finally, to save all from information overload, we have set up a warehouse for information and updates at http://www.brewingknowledge.com/

This will have the latest news and updates about our Programmes and Developments. All updates and information will now be available on our websites
 
Many thanks for the feedback by the Zonal Chairpersons and the Field Officers, for the most valued inputs.

With best wishes for the Independence Day.

“Train the Trainer” – Capacity Building and training at Coimbatore and Delhi

Workshop at CIRS Coimbatore
NTW Coimbatore : 9th, 10th & 11th Oct.’09

The NAA workshop with International Support will now happen at this great venue!

http://www.cirschool.org/

We are happy to work with the School and the Chinmaya family to build up the Award Programme.
Workshop will commence 9th morning and end 11th evening. Details will be worked out this week.

The workshop is in two parts with one session in Delhi (Role of Volunteers) – this will have 20 in all, the delegates for this will be decided by National Office.

Participation in Coimbatore:
Total 30 = North, West & East will have 5 each, 5 for NAA and 10 for South.
30 number includes faculty and trainers (NAA 5 will cover that).
NAA 5 delegates = Director QA (Quality Assurance), One AV Team Member and three trainers.

The Zones are free to decide the five participants and may need to do rail bookings ASAP. Zones to please start the search for the 5 participants in each zone.

AT DELHI - more for Award Volunteers and Partners of the Award Programme.
The session in Delhi (Role of Volunteers) –  will have 20 in all, the delegates for this will be decided by National Office alone.

Please send us your suggestions and inputs latest by the 31st of July 2009. Nominations for trainers are welcome too.